Sharing children with a narcissist

Important things you need to know about a narcissist.

-The concept of "shared parenting" in divorce does not exist, it is now called parallel parenting.

They are in no way interested in making it a success for the children's sake.

They are only interested in using the children against you in the future, also at the expense of your children.

Everything is conditional with a narcissist. Even love.

You should know that there is always an ulterior motive behind everything.

When they finally behave nicely, give you love, attention, or change their behavior for the better, there is always a reason for it. They are up to something.

You are and will never be “good enough” in their eyes.

This is a “mind trick” on their part.

You should also know the following:

-No matter how hard you try, you can never meet in the middle.

-Everything you say and do will be used against you at some point.

- They have periodic memory loss.

-Gaslighting is a basic thing for a narcissist.

-They can't give you the love you deserve.

- You will never get them into therapy because there is nothing “wrong” with them. It is “you” who should go to therapy if you ask them.

- Couples therapy cannot be carried out if you want it because you are not getting along with each other, etc.

They are masters at mirroring your behavior.

Therefore, you can see “love” as well as good qualities in them.

You will never get them into therapy because there is nothing “wrong” with them. It is “you” who should go to therapy if you ask them.

They don't have the same values and expectations for a relationship as you do.

If you get them into couples therapy, there are often only very few

times and they don't complete.

They are only there to get something from you and not because they are truly sad and want it to succeed.

Evolutionarily/and spiritually speaking, they work from their "primal" brain and have not really developed the "superstructure" which includes empathy, neighborly love, etc.

The primal brain is “pure survival” and the basic needs that must be met.

Need postponement is non-existent.

It might make it easier for you to understand them.

They are very simple to understand in their behavior if you understand their "structure" and where they "operate" from.

They often follow the same script.

Some are better at mirroring than others.

When you mirror other people, you can imitate behavior that is not your own.

That's why you get cheated.

However, you must remember that their behavior is also due to early failure and that they are probably struggling inside because they are missing their inner core.

Empaths and narcissists are the “perfect” match, vibrationally speaking.

The “empath” gives and gives at the expense of himself, and the narcissist takes and takes at the expense of everyone else and is fine with it.

You can see it, right?

It is therefore really important to pay attention to yourself and your own patterns.

Therapy is a really good starting point for this.

The more you learn about yourself and learn to love yourself, the higher you vibrate and are therefore no longer a “match” for narcissists and other toxic people.

Ps.

In a relationship with a Narcissist, you are not “two to tango”

They just withdraw and do whatever suits them and you can't dance Tango alone.